


Coming of ‘Someday’

by ladydragon76



Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: Commission fic, Fanfiction, M/M, Rating: NC-17 - Freeform, character: sideswipe, character: starscream, character: sunstreaker, commissions, genre: angst, genre: drama, kink: marriage of convenience, smut: sparks, smut: sticky, verse: g1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-25
Updated: 2014-02-25
Packaged: 2018-01-13 17:48:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1235536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladydragon76/pseuds/ladydragon76
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><b>Summary:</b> Proof of commitment to the peace is required, meaning the Decepticons and Autobots each have to choose someone to bond to a willing member of the opposite faction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coming of ‘Someday’

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SkittlesFairy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkittlesFairy/gifts).



> **‘Verse:** G1  
>  **Series:** None  
>  **Rating:** NC-17  
>  **Characters:** Starscream/Sideswipe/Sunstreaker  
>  **Warnings:** Dubcon, Arranged Bonding, Mention of Traumatic/Possibly Triggering Past Events  
>  **Notes:** Commissioned by SkittlesFairy! Thank you!  <3

“No! They have no right to demand such a thing!” Prowl’s voice rang out over the shocked murmurs, uncharacteristically heated, though given the topic, it was unsurprising.

“Prowl’s right,” Jazz added. “Ain’t no way they can ask this of ya, and ain’t no way we’ll stand by and watch Megatron push ya into a bond.”

Prime shook his helm, holding up his hands for quiet, but no one obeyed. The meeting room was in utter disarray. Chairs and tables were knocked askew, energon was spilled, and all around mechs had launched to their feet to shout and argue.

“Ain’t right,” Ironhide called out. “Them neutrals come crawlin’ outta the holes they hid in and slinkin’ back ta the planet they abandoned, and now they think they can force this on us? No fraggin’ way!”

“I don’t get it?” Bluestreak said, his tone questioning. Beside him Bumblebee shrugged, looking angry.

“Quiet!” Prime ordered, voice booming over everyone else’s. “I want everyone silent. _Everyone_!” he snapped as Red Alert’s mouth opened to protest. “I know this is not ideal, but I _will_ maintain the peace we’ve finally won at any cost.”

“It doesn’t have to be you,” Ratchet said, voice even despite the pale, furious glow to his optics.

“It does, because I say it does,” Prime replied.

“We need you to lead us, sir,” Prowl added, his voice wrangled back to his usual mild tones. “It is extremely dangerous to give Megatron access to your mind and spark the way a bond requires.”

“Yeah. Let one of us do it instead if ya don’t think there’s another way besides bondin’ across the factions,” Jazz suggested.

“This is not up for debate or discussion,” Prime growled, showing a temper he rarely displayed off the battlefield. “I’m _informing_ you all that I will be bonding to Megatron. _I_ am our offer, and Megatron has accepted.”

“No way,” Smokescreen muttered, arms crossing. “This is nuts.”

Sound exploded again with his comment, voices raised in anger and protest. Prime shook his helm, optics closing in obvious frustration, hand lifting to pinch the bridge of his nose. Prowl leaned in close to say something that didn’t carry, and Prime’s helm shook again, more vigorously, his optics narrowed and angry.

“It’s fraggin’ rape!”

The silence was deafening, all optics going to Ironhide.

“It’s not,” Prime protested. “I’m agreeing to it.”

Ironhide snorted, but there were murmurs of agreement now rippling through the Autobots. “It is, Prime,” Ironhide insisted. “Those neutrals are holdin’ all of us hostage, forcin’ you _and_ Megatron ta do somethin’ neither of ya would ever choose ta do. Ain’t right, and I say frag them. They don’t get ta dictate what another mech does with his spark.”

For a moment Prime looked defeated, but he still shook his helm. “Megatron and I have agreed to this. We want peace, and both of us would still lead Cybertron. The only other alternative is likely to be a whole new war with us and the Decepticons on one side and the neutrals on the other.”

“Heh, we’d win,” Cliffjumper snickered.

Prime’s optics glowed dimly. “Yes. We would win. We would slaughter them by the hundreds, the thousands. And those that survived would be little better than slaves. A conquered people who fear all who are in a position of authority. It’s a recipe for disaster.”

“It would be the old Senate all over again,” Prowl added softly, his doorwings sinking.

No one spoke, and very few were able to meet Prime’s optics.

“This is not ideal,” Prime repeated. “However, it is an opportunity. Megatron and I will find a way, it’s already been decided. What I am here to ask of you, is who would be willing to bond to the mech the Decepticons have offered as their half of the commitment?”

“Isn’t that Megatron?” Skids asked.

“No. Megatron is the one who accepted me as the Autobots’ offering,” Prime explained. “What we need now is a volunteer to bond to Starscream.”

Chaos reigned once more.

Sideswipe looked at Sunstreaker, optic ridge arched in a silent question.

_Are you kidding me?_ Sunstreaker asked, snorting out loud.

_We could do it. We could keep him in line._

_No, what you mean is that we could sacrifice ourselves for the Autobot cause when slag goes south._

_Yeah. But we could do it._ Sideswipe gestured around to the other mechs yelling and shouting, incoherent, frightened, angry. _Who else is there? Prime’s already taken._

Sunstreaker sighed, looked unhappy about it, but he gestured in a ‘go ahead’ motion with a hand.

Bracing himself, Sideswipe lifted a hand, and shouted, “We’ll do it.”

“Are you fragging kidding me?!” Ratchet bellowed, optics whiting out.

“I don’t know that that is such a good idea,” Prime began.

“Why the frag not?” Sunstreaker demanded. He stood, chin lifted, arms crossed, and legs braced, the picture of haughty self-confidence.

Sideswipe mirrored the pose, but he was smirking rather than challenging. “Yeah. Why the frag not?”

“But you hate the Seekers,” Bluestreak pointed out.

“And we’re talkin’ peace here. Not ya beatin’ Screamer ta slag,” Ironhide added. “Good at that. Shouldn’t be you two. Might need ya later.”

Voices rose again, but Sideswipe waved both arms for attention. “Hey. Hey! _We_ know how to handle a _bond_!”

“Shouldn’t it be an officer?” Bumblebee asked. “I mean, not that I really care if he’s insulted about rank or whatever, but Starscream is the Second in Command. Would they let a regular soldier bond to him? Like, would that even count? For the neutrals?”

Everyone looked to Prime.

“There were no stipulations regarding rank, but given the rivalry the two of you had with the Seekers, I don’t know that Starscream would accept,” Prime said. “I don’t even understand why you would volunteer.”

“Because they’re crazy. Besides, ain’t no one else volunteering,” Gears huffed. “I’d rather just keep the war going than frag a ‘Con.”

Sideswipe put a hand on Sunstreaker’s arm, ignored Gears -and the others that laughed or agreed- and kept his optics on Prime. “We’re the best choice. First of all, like I said, we know how to manage a bond already. Physically, we’re capable of handling Starscream. He’s not going to be abusing us, or we’ll kick his aft. We’re smart enough to avoid him manipulating us, through the bond or otherwise. And, it’s not _us_ that will be bonding to Starscream, it’s _me_. This goes south in the worst way, all Sunny and I have to do is die. We’ll take Screamer down with us.”

Doubt still shaded all the energy fields, but there were murmurs of agreement. Even Ironhide nodded, and said, “That’s true. And we wouldn’t be losin’ another officer.” He gestured to Prowl and Jazz. “With Prime down, we’ll need the two of you ta lead.”

“I can’t believe this is even happening.” Ratchet slumped down into a chair.

“Stop. Please! Everyone just stop!” Prime ordered. “Primus! This is _peace_ , and you’re all talking as if it’s bound to fail. Where is your faith? Where is your hope? I know this isn’t going to be easy, but you’re all speaking as though we’ve already failed and these bondings are just something we must go through the motions with.”

“It is wise to have a contingency plan,” Prowl offered.

“And that’s where I come in,” Sideswipe said. “There’ll be a strain on my bond to Starscream, but if by some miracle he’s really after peace too, and not plotting some crazy slag, then Sunny can join us in the bond, and yay, happily ever after. If not, we let it kill all three of us.”

Ratchet shook his helm, just visible from where the twins stood. “I could kill him easily enough if that was required. Letting the bond drag you all down is… awful.”

“You are far too valuable, Ratchet,” Perceptor said. “You are the only fully trained medic left, and your expertise is needed in your field.”

“I could do it.” Ironhide shrugged. “Don’t have quite the same history with them jets as the twins do.”

“Someone… uh… a little more mature might not be a bad idea.” Wheeljack’s helm fins flashed a dull orange as he hunched his shoulders.

“This is stupid,” Sunstreaker snapped. “You asked for volunteers,” he said, glaring directly at Prime. “We’re volunteering. We’re also the best choice. Fine, we’re young, and violent, and have a history, but that’s even better.”

“Yeah!” Sideswipe agreed, jumping in. “I mean, they’ll look and they’ll see two major rivals bonding and getting along. If this is all a front for the greater good, then we really are the best choice. Pits, if nothing else, you’ve got the Autobots’ biggest troublemakers with the ‘Cons’ biggest troublemaker. We’ll keep one another busy and out of everyone else’s way.”

“And we’re good looking,” Sunstreaker added. “Not to mention ‘Cons value strength. We’re tough and they know it.”

Ripples of agreement ran through the crowd, and Sideswipe watched as Prime’s shoulders finally sank a bit in resignation. “You’re all prepared for the worst case scenario, but what about the best?” Prime asked, his words silencing everyone. “What if the Decepticons are as sincere about this peace as _I_ am? What if all goes well? What if Starscream is happy to live out his life in a lab, as Megatron has hinted to me?” He pinned Sideswipe and Sunstreaker both with a steady, piercing stare. “Can you live the rest of your lives, what I hope will be thousands of vorns, with Starscream as your bondmate? In your sparks? In your minds? An equal and constant part of your lives? Can you do that?”

Sideswipe hesitated -but only for an instant- then decisively nodded.

_How likely is that?_ Sunstreaker asked over the bond, but said, “Yes,” loud and clear.

If nothing else, Prime looked even more resigned. “Very well. I will contact Megatron. Starscream does get a say in this, but if he agrees, we’ll move forward with the bonding ceremonies.”

Sideswipe watched Prime turn and leave, the buzz of conversation swelling in his wake.

_You sure about this, Sides? You’re going to have to ‘face him, you know._

_I can handle one Seeker. And Starscream won’t be allowed to hurt us either._ Sideswipe flashed a grin at his brother, though it was mostly bravado, and they both knew it. _It might even end up being fun._

Sunstreaker’s doubt and worry could be felt clearly over the bond, but he didn’t argue. They really were the best choice. There wasn’t anything Starscream could do that hadn’t been done to them before, and they had the endurance and will to do whatever needed done. Good or bad.

Sideswipe shoved down any doubts of his own he might have felt, and faced the crowd of mechs with determined confidence.

~ | ~

Tradition sucked, Sideswipe decided as he and Starscream were led to the room where they’d spark bond. Megatron and Prime were the main show, of course, but there were still _thousands_ of mechs watching Sideswipe as he and Starscream swore all kinds of ridiculous slag to one another that neither of them meant, nor could they possibly mean. They weren’t in love, and no one believed they were, so why the frag had he had to say that he would love Starscream until all were one in The Well?

And just what was ‘The Well’? Even Optimus Prime shifted his weight from foot to foot over the weird, flowery poems. Megatron looked bored. And had Sideswipe actually thought all the slag they were made to say and listen to was important, he’d have been insulted by how Starscream’s attention wandered off and his gaze stared blindly into the distance until they had to repeat some other weird line about living only for the other.

Blah, blah, blah.

At least it was over, but now they had to actually do the deed. It made Sideswipe uncomfortable to know that Megatron and Prime were just on the other side of the one wall, having to do the exact same thing.

“If you don’t mind, I think I’d like to skip the foreplay,” Starscream said, and crossed to a padded bench that looked like it’d seen better days, ignoring the berth completely. He straddled it, and stared back at Sideswipe expectantly.

“Yeah. I mean, no, I don’t mind. We can skip it. No point pretending we want this, right? Kinda sick of the lies already today.”

Starscream snorted. “At least we can agree on that.” He pointed to the bench in front of him. “Come. Let’s get this over with.”

Sideswipe hesitated, but Sunstreaker reached out to him through their bond, nudging him forward. It would be ok. Look, it was a bench. They could sit face to face, only touch enough to get the job done, then it’d be over. Starscream wasn’t even putting out any creeper vibes. Well, other than the fact that he was _Starscream_.

They could do this.

They had no choice, because they wouldn’t be allowed to leave this room until they were bonded. Best to just get to it.

And yet Sideswipe still hesitated, rubbing his palms down his thighs as he forced his feet forward. Sitting on the bench and facing Starscream was the hardest thing yet. Until Sideswipe saw the Seeker’s canopy roll to the side, chest plates splitting down the middle. His spark lurched as the red plating parted and Starscream’s laser core was exposed. He had to fight to get his armor to retract as well, but Starscream wasn’t going to prove braver than him. Sunstreaker was there too, not close, and the bond was narrowed, but he was there and lending Sideswipe what confidence he could.

Brilliant, dazzling light bleached the color from their armor, and Starscream leaned forward. Sideswipe didn’t realize he was arching back to escape until the Seeker’s hand pressed to the middle of his back, arresting his retreat. He did pause though, and stared into Sideswipe’s face.

“We’ve no out now,” Starscream said, tone surprisingly gentle.

Sideswipe cursed, grasped Starscream’s shoulders, and pressed forward. He reached with his spark, wincing at the first touch. It hadn’t hurt, but it was intense. He pulsed again, and a few more times. Was Starscream resisting?

But no, there was an answering flare of energy, clumsy and unsure. Hadn’t Starscream done this before? It took another few pulses before their sparks found a rhythm, and Sideswipe was convinced the Seeker had never merged. That… helped. Sideswipe led, relaxing a little, and wrapping his arms around Starscream’s shoulders. He sensed nervousness to match his own, determination, and… longing.

Sideswipe couldn’t explain that one because he knew it wasn’t him that Starscream longed for. They’d talked a little after the decision had been made, and everyone knew it was for the sake of peace.

However, it was rather hot the way Starscream whimpered and gasped. He clung to Sideswipe as energy volleyed faster and faster between them, rocking forward, pressing harder with each throb of his spark. He was unpracticed. Starscream without artifice. Sideswipe moaned, his own trepidation falling away as the charge swelled.

Starscream broke first, wings snapping out, back bowing. He shouted, the sound startled and ecstatic both. Then the backlash slammed into Sideswipe, and the universe whited out for one perfect, blinding moment of sheer bliss.

They were clinging to one another as the overload ebbed, and Sideswipe could feel the newborn bond. It wasn’t at all as strong as what he shared with Sunstreaker, but it was there, and real.

“Oh…” Starscream said in wonder, his hand coming up to press to his chest plating after it closed, just over his spark. “That’s… That’s you, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” Sideswipe reached for Sunstreaker, clutching after that bond, needing to feel his twin.

_I’m here. You did good. Ready for Ratchet to come in?_

_Yeah. I want out of here,_ Sideswipe replied. “Ratchet’s coming.”

Starscream blinked, confusion showing on his expressive face for a moment. “Sunstreaker.” He tipped his helm. “Was he there? Could he feel… us?”

“No. I mean, he was there,” Sideswipe said, “but not close enough to experience the overload with me.”

“Hnh.”

“Hnh? What does ‘hnh’ mean?” Sideswipe asked, scowling.

Starscream lifted his hands, palms out, but before he could reply the door opened. They both faced Ratchet as he stomped into the room.

“Let’s get this slag over with. I need to see your sparks,” Ratchet said, lifting a handheld scanner.

Sideswipe grimaced, but bared his spark, trying not to cringe away as Starscream stepped up beside him to do the same. Ratchet looked back and forth a couple times, then nodded despite the frown tugging down the corners of his mouth. He scanned them, and asked, “Any pains? Anything unusual?”

“No pain,” Starscream replied, closing his plating as Ratchet waved him off. “Intense, but what would be unusual?”

“It was fine,” Sideswipe said, glancing at the Seeker. “A little slow to start, but once we connected it was…” He shrugged, feeling stupidly shy. “It was normal. I can feel him there, but it’s faint.”

Ratchet stowed the scanner in his subspace, and nodded again. “Alright. You’re both free to go. Comm me right away if either of you start feeling any pain at all.”

They both said they would, and then followed Ratchet out. Sideswipe went straight to Sunstreaker, pressing against his twin and tucking his face into his neck for a moment.

_You’re ok._

_I know. Just need you._

“Sunstreaker,” Starscream greeted. “Do either of you have anything you need to pick up?”

“What? To like, move in?” Sunstreaker kept an arm around Sideswipe’s waist, and shook his helm. “No. All we own is in our subspace, or can be grabbed tomorrow.”

Starscream looked between the two of them, silent, his expression giving nothing away. “As you wish.” He tipped his helm. “Shall we?”

They weren’t far from the main building the Decepticons had chosen as theirs, but Sideswipe was still surprised that Starscream _walked_ with them. They received some strange looks from the mechs wandering the streets now that the ceremonies were over, but no one stopped them. Sideswipe didn’t know if it was intimidation or common sense that kept people from shouting their congratulations. They were certainly recognized, so it wasn’t that.

_Probably a good thing,_ Sunstreaker said as they entered the building and rode the lift up to Starscream’s floor. _I’d probably have flattened the fragger stupid enough to try and congratulate you._

Sideswipe just nodded.

Thundercracker and Skywarp were sitting in the lounge, and Thundercracker stood as Starscream entered their apartment. “Hey,” he said, nodding in greeting to Sideswipe and Sunstreaker. “It went ok?”

“It’s done,” Starscream replied, heading to the sideboard where they apparently stored their energon. He gathered enough cubes for everyone, then passed them out, inviting Sideswipe and Sunstreaker to sit.

“Thanks,” Sideswipe muttered, sipping the energon. “So…” He trailed off, not even having a smart comment to make to lighten them mood.

“Which is our room?” Sunstreaker asked.

“I thought we would share that one,” Starscream answered, pointed off to his left. “The door across from that is where Thundercracker and Skywarp have been recharging, and the one at the back of the alcove leads to the washroom.”

Sideswipe’s spark dropped into his gut, and he shook his helm. “No. Share? No way. Me and Sunny share. We might be bonded, but no way can we recharge with you in the room.”

“I’m not going to hurt you,” Starscream huffed, his irritation actually feeling more normal.

“Yeah, and that’s _our_ room,” Skywarp added. “He can’t ‘charge with us.”

“He could-”

“He will,” Starscream cut across Thundercracker. “They’re right, it’s too soon.”

“Sleep out here then,” Skywarp argued. “Or let them. You get all bitchy about me and TC fragging.

Sunstreaker stood, and though Skywarp’s mouth was open, he went abruptly silent. “We did our part for the day. _Sides_ did his part. We’re going to bed, you three figure the rest out for yourselves.”

Sideswipe rose, feeling dazed. He let Sunstreaker take his hand and lead him to the room Starscream had indicated. It was probably unfair, but then, what about this was fair? Sure, he’d chosen this and Starscream had agreed, but it was still all slagged up. And glancing back as he was towed into the room, Sideswipe saw Starscream watching him, a contemplative look on his face. The next few days were going to be interesting, stuck inside alone with his new bondmate.

Primus help them both.

~ | ~

Starscream woke with Thundercracker and Skywarp, shared energon, and saw them off for their day working at whichever restoration site was on the docket. Nice and domestic.

Weird.

He and Sideswipe would have the next three days off of their reconstruction duties to allow the bond to settle. That left Starscream at a bit of a loss. They didn’t have enough belongings for their home to be in disarray, and since it’d been cleaned of any and all dust just the morning before the bonding, he didn’t know what to do with himself while he waited for Sideswipe to come out for his morning energon.

For that matter, where was Sunstreaker? Had he left already? Had he arranged to be off duty as well?

Huffing, and hating the churning doubt, Starscream stomped into the washroom to clean himself. He took as long as he could, but energy still being an issue for Cybertron meant he couldn’t just languish away all morning. Dried, shined, and thoughts chasing themselves in circles, he grabbed a datapad with some of his pet projects on it, and flopped to a sofa to try and accomplish something.

It was rare that science couldn’t hold Starscream’s attention, but within minutes he found his mind wandering, optics drawn to the door where Sideswipe was.

Or was he?

Had the twins left before Starscream and his trine had woken? Were they both still in there?

Starscream tried, but he kept ending up staring at the door.

_Slag this._

The datapad was cast aside, and Starscream stomped toward the door, but he paused before he reached it. Just slamming in there wasn’t going to help anything, and he had known when Megatron volunteered him for this little debacle that he could either rail against it -as he usually did- or he could try and grow something at least comfortable out of it.

Comfortable wasn’t going to happen if he didn’t rein in his temper and natural inclination to demand what he wanted.

Starscream cycled his vents, then again, focusing inward, using a very old technique Skyfire had taught him to calm himself. Wouldn’t it be grand, he thought as he focused on drawing air in, if he could win over one of his biggest rivals on the battlefield? He let the breath out, wings sinking to a more relaxed position on his back, then turned to get some energon.

There was no answer when Starscream knocked on the door, but he forced himself to wait, then knock again. Still no answer, but was that Sideswipe being obstinate, or were the twins truly out? They needed to pick up their belongings after all. Maybe they had gone to do that?

He needed to know. There was no way Starscream could sit all day and just wonder.

The door opened with the push of a button, and that almost convinced Starscream the twins were out, but then he spotted Sideswipe on the berth. Startled blue optics stared for a moment before narrowing.

“What are you doing?” Sideswipe demanded, sitting up, then scrambling off the berth.

Starscream tipped his helm, curious at Sideswipe’s actions, but held out the cube. “I am bringing my new bondmate his breakfast.” He walked forward, wings consciously lower and loosely held back, forcing himself to look as relaxed and nonthreatening as possible. They really had been enemies just a few months ago, and without his twin close by, Sideswipe’s… nervousness made sense. However, that wouldn’t stop Starscream from snarking a little bit. “Or were you planning some hunger strike protest a day late?”

Sideswipe eyed the energon, taking it almost reluctantly. “Not a protest. Just wanted to be alone and read for a bit.”

Starscream crossed to the berth and sat on the edge, picking up the datapad. “What are you reading?” he asked, noting the English words.

The datapad was snatched away. “None of your damn business, that’s what!” Sideswipe shoved the datapad into his subspace, and glowered down at Starscream. “What the frag do you want?”

Pointing at the energon, Starscream replied, “To bring you breakfast.” How odd was it that _he_ was being the reasonable one?

“Mission accomplished. Thank you ever so much. Now get out.”

“I’ve tied my spark to such a charmer.”

“I’m not here to fragging charm you, _Screamer_. I’m here as a frelling hostage so my Prime doesn’t have to slaughter Neutrals in the war _they_ would start if we didn’t do this!”

Starscream stood, wings flaring angrily, though he managed to keep his voice below the sharp notes he was so well-known for. “But we did do it. It is done. You are, like it or not, my bondmate, and we need to figure it out and manage peace between ourselves. Calling me _that_ name is _not_ the way to accomplish peace.” Primus, Skywarp only got away with it because Starscream had gotten tired of telling him, then tired of hitting him, to make him stop, and he didn’t say it with the same derogatory inflection everyone else did. Starscream knew his vocalizer’s damage was annoying. He _used_ it on purpose to grate on Megatron’s nerves. That did not mean, however, that he in any way appreciated being mocked.

“Invading my space when I _clearly_ don’t want to deal with you isn’t the way to do it either!” Sideswipe hissed in return.

“I brought you energon!”

“You waltzed right in here even though I never opened the door for you!”

“It’s _my_ room!”

“You gave it to _me_!”

“To _share_!”

“With _Sunstreaker_!”

Starscream snorted. “Then you misunderstood. We are now bonded. That needs renewed, and the whole point of us being stuck off-duty is so we can strengthen that bond.”

“Slag that! Once worked. You heard Ratchet.” Sideswipe crossed his arms, the energon sloshing dangerously close to spilling.

Arms swinging out in exasperation, Starscream yelled, “You’re fragging bonded! You _know_ it takes repetition to maintain!”

“We’ll maintain it only when we _have_ to!” Sideswipe shouted right back, and slammed the cube onto the berthside table.

“Don’t waste that!” Starscream snapped, watching as the energon splashed over the sides and even onto Sideswipe’s hand.

“Just get out!”

“We _need_ -” Starscream cut himself off, and really looked at Sideswipe.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

Pale optics, plating clamped down tight, balance centered, and body tight. Sideswipe was coiled for an attack, and Starscream blinked, helm tipping. He stepped back, visibly shaking his wings loose again, and sat on the edge of the berth. “Why don’t you want me?”

“What?” Sideswipe yelped, optics flaring brightly.

“I’m aware of how attractive I am physically. I’m pretty even among Seekers. I’m not bad in the berth at all, though I know yesterday can hardly speak to that claim.” Starscream spread his hands out. “I _can’t_ hurt you. I don’t even want to, but if I did, it’d invalidate the treaty. I’m not going to abuse you.”

“I never said you would.” Sideswipe winced, hearing the defensiveness in his tone as clearly as Starscream did.

“Then what’s the problem?”

Sideswipe shifted his weight and rubbed at the back of his helm. Everything about his body _screamed_ fear. “Look, I don’t… Me and Sunny…” He heaved a sigh, and stomped over to slump onto the berth just out of Starscream’s reach.

“Alright, you want the ugly story? Here you go.” Sideswipe rubbed his palms along his thighs. “Me and Sunny kinda came up in the gutters. Bad things happen there when you’re too young to defend yourself, but we learned how to fight some, and then joined the fights in the Pits. We weren’t all that good at first, but we got better. We have this rep, but really we don’t interface much with others. We spark. I mean, we’re bonded and we… love each other, and all that.” He waved a hand. “But we don’t ‘face much at all, and I don’t _want_ to ‘face with you more than we have to.”

Starscream leaned forward to brace his elbows on his knees and scrubbed his face. There was a lot that Sideswipe wasn’t saying, but Starscream was not at all naïve. “Twins.”

“Yeah. And all that it used to mean to the superstitious slaggers that used to populate this planet.”

“Abandoned to the streets?” Starscream said more than asked, and saw as Sideswipe nodded. He knew what happened to younglings forced onto the streets. He knew what happened to the gladiators that didn’t win, but weren’t killed. He knew too, that many of them, Megatron himself, had been auctioned off to the wealthy that wanted some dangerous creature in their berth for a night.

Nodding, and sitting up straight, Starscream said, “Ok.”

“Ok?”

“Yes.” Starscream flicked a hand out, then stood. “I’m not going to live my life feared by my own bondmate. I’m not going to coerce you. I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to. But!” He pointed at Sideswipe even as he walked toward the door. “I will do what needs done to see myself happy. That means gaining your trust.” He smirked. “Charming you too.”

Emotions flashed across Sideswipe’s face too quickly to really be named, his mouth working for a moment as Starscream stopped by the door. “Don’t tell.”

“What?”

“Don’t tell anyone what I told you. Ratchet knows some of it because he’s fixed us so much, but no one else even remembers anymore.”

Starscream frowned. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, and Thundercracker and Skywarp _should_ be told so-”

“No!” Sideswipe jumped to his feet.

“They really should-”

“ _No_! No. You want my trust? That’s how you start. You don’t talk about this. Not even with me or Sunny. Just… leave it alone. It’s the past and it’s done, and I don’t want to talk about it, or have other people knowing so they can act all weird, or try to talk about it, or… whatever! Got it?”

Lips pressed into a thin, displeased line, Starscream dipped his chin in a slight nod. “If you wish, but at least then work with me. For all our sakes. Don’t hide away in this room from me.”

“Not hiding.”

“And not pouting either,” Starscream said with soft huff of laughter. “Come on. Let’s be productive on some level. Don’t you have belongings to bring over here?”

Sideswipe grabbed the cube of energon, downing it in one long pull. Starscream watched him as he cleaned up the spill, then dispersed the cube’s field.

“Ok. Let’s go then,” Sideswipe said, and swept neatly past Starscream.

~ | ~

Life fell into an easy routine, though at first everyone was cautious and tense. Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, and even Thundercracker were withdrawn and quiet. Skywarp roved between looking helpless on how to handle the situation, and manic episodes of trying to get everyone to play with him. What that ‘play’ involved depended on his mood. Interfacing was turned down flat by all but Thundercracker -though he tended to suggest they do that ‘later’- but card games and the occasional board game were often accepted.

Starscream, unfortunately, usually found out after the fact. While literally _everyone_ on Cybertron was working, those with engineering and scientific training were encouraged into the growing lab. Energon processing and gathering techniques were the top issue they were tackling, but once upon a time, for far more nefarious reasons, Megatron and Shockwave, and Starscream separately, had all contemplated moving Cybertron into orbit around the same star as Earth. The Sol system was dismissed as pretty much no one wanted to be that close to human politics when their own were so unstable, but there were plenty of young stars out there. In fact, in just under a tenth of a vorn, Cybertron would be rolling past a very likely candidate. Work was being done on just how to force the planet into the right place to benefit their kind.

It was all important, fascinating work, and Starscream enjoyed it. In the lab, faction truly did fall away. He bantered with Wheeljack, shared notes with Skyfire, bickered with Mixmaster, and even learned a few innovations from a handful of neutral scientists. It was something of a dream come true.

The downside was that he was rarely home to enjoy his odd little family. Mornings started early for everyone, but earlier for those working on rebuilding the residential district. Starscream woke when his trine mates got up, but once they were out of the room, he usually grabbed another hour of recharge before heading to the lab. Their home was empty and silent as he refueled and readied any spare notes he wanted to take for the day.

Most nights Starscream arrived home late enough that the twins and his trine were already recharging. He would refuel, clean up quietly, then make notes of any thoughts he had before joining Thundercracker and Skywarp in their berth. The first time he came home to what was apparently a marathon interface session that he had no interest in joining, was the first night he risked crawling into the berth with the twins. Starscream had curled up on the edge, no bolster for his helm, and trying to take up as little space as possible. Come morning and the twins waking, and Sideswipe had been sprawled across Starscream’s chest with Sunstreaker pressed to his twin’s back.

Starscream had been braced for a negative reaction, but Sideswipe had merely snickered, commented on how they had turned off their audials after Skywarp’s second screaming overload, and asked if Starscream wanted some breakfast. He’d been so surprised by the lack of anger, that he hadn’t even mentioned how much his wing hurt from having the weight of a former frontliner lying on it all night.

Skyfire was able to unkink the cables anyway.

After such a positive experience, the scientist in Starscream got the better of him. Would future results be the same? He began spending a night here or there with the twins instead of his trine regardless of what Thundercracker and Skywarp got up to. When every single morning brought contentedly purring Autobots, and not a single drop of Starscream’s blood, he began to increase the number of nights he recharged with them.

Very occasionally, Starscream would join Thundercracker and Skywarp in their berth. He didn’t interface often with them, but then they were a bare spark merging away from being bonded. Starscream needed to be in the mood, and they needed to be suitably _not_ sappy so he wouldn’t end up feeling like an interloper. It happened, they were trine after all and cared about one another, but Starscream certainly enjoyed recharging with his own bondmate more. Especially when Sideswipe _offered_ to share sparks again to strengthen their bond.

One thing that did bother Starscream as the months passed, was the imbalance in that bond. Sunstreaker wasn’t unfriendly, but beyond recharging, he never put himself in Starscream’s space. He would talk to Starscream, and couldn’t even be termed as ‘cold’, but he never warmed up either. The twins renewed their bond often. Starscream had a vague awareness through his connection to Sideswipe, but their bond wasn’t at all strong enough to share emotions, let alone thoughts or experiences.

At least everyone was getting along. Thundercracker and Sunstreaker were both quiet and rather calm, and despite their separate interests, they seemed to enjoy one another’s presence. Thundercracker would read while Sunstreaker drew or painted small things on scrap sheets of metal. Starscream took it upon himself to subtly encourage them both, and their household now boasted a fair number of datapads full of all kinds of reading material. Thundercracker appeared to be sorting and organizing it, and Starscream left him to it. He played at the lab too, mixing paints, and refurbishing old, larger datapads and styluses to bring home and leave out for Sunstreaker to find. There was now an array of random, rather impressive, paintings on the walls of their apartment, and Starscream suspected that the datapads contained even more. Not that he would go looking without an invitation. He was absolutely still working on that whole building trust thing.

Skywarp, if he was still awake when Starscream returned home, would gush about the ‘totally awesome’ things Sideswipe could do with energon. He wasn’t mistaken either. Starscream brought home their non-poisonous results from the energon research, and often that night or the next day he would stumble across treats, or high grade, or some little sweet gelled… thing. They were always tasty, and on his very occasional days off, Starscream made it a point to speak with Sideswipe. He was shocked to find how competent the mech was in chemistry.

Starscream was also shocked to learn of the pranking plots Sideswipe and Skywarp planned. He was lucky to have Thundercracker and Sunstreaker minding their mates, because some of those ‘fun ideas’ would likely start a new war.

More months passed, and Starscream watched, observing, gauging the results, planning. Each step forward was calculated, because if he knew anything, he knew he wasn’t at all patient. Except in science.

“Behave today,” Starscream said with a smile as Skywarp and Sideswipe doodled maps on one of Sunstreaker’s tablets. They were up to no good, but so far the ban on anything beyond planning and discussing pranks was holding.

“I always behave,” Sideswipe replied, flashing a grin up at Starscream.

Following his own plots, Starscream smirked, and bent to brush his lips over Sideswipe’s. “I’m so sure.” The shock on Sideswipe’s face melted to a softer smile as Starscream drew back.

Sunstreaker stood between Starscream and the door, so as he strode toward it, he paused, stealing a light kiss from him as well.

“Hey! Where’s mine?” Skywarp called, but the door was closing.

Starscream would make it up to him later, but his mind was focused on the softness in Sideswipe’s optics and the way Sunstreaker had pressed into the kiss, accepting and willing. And when it was noticed that he was smiling more than usual, he simply explained that a project was going better than he’d anticipated, his colleagues nodding and sharing his good mood.

The following weeks went even better. The morning goodbye kiss -which Starscream rose early for the sole purpose of giving- became commonplace. Then it evolved into him doing his best to get home before recharge time just so he could kiss at least Sideswipe again.

When one morning came along that Starscream was in a hurry, he purposely rushed for the door without offering the kiss goodbye. Sideswipe stopped him with a shout, and trotted over to lean up and kiss Starscream. Starscream let his fingers slide along Sideswipe’s jawline and purred.

“See you this evening,” Sideswipe purred back. And then took it a step further that night by initiating their spark merge.

While kisses and clearly willing mergings were nice - _very_ nice- the voluntary hugs were even better. Starscream understood the implicit trust he was being granted when Sideswipe allowed himself to be not just lightly kissed, but held. Starscream very much enjoyed the fact that the twins felt comfortable being snuggled close and lying under the blanket of his wing.

Starscream had been startled to realize that he was happy.

Genuinely. Truly. Actually _happy_.

He didn’t really know how it had happened, but once he realized it, he feared the loss. Then he became determined not to lose it. Their home was peaceful enough. At least the five of them had managed to slip into their own niches and it was working.

Stretching beyond their own walls, were the successful attempts to rebuild culture as the city itself was rebuilt. Seekers drew in close, other flyer models joining them, and as other mechs moved to the newer, more recently finished residences, they took over the vacated apartments. Starscream stepped back from the long-coveted position of power even as he was turned to as a ranking officer in the Decepticons. He bowed out almost without a thought, deferring to Acid Storm’s age and living knowledge of what Seeker culture once was. Finally free of the fears and oppression that came with war, there was even talk of voluntary trines forming, followed by whispers of bondings.

As Seekers gathered together to recover Vos’ lost history, the Praxians did the same with Prowl taking their lead. Starscream only had the chance to witness Acid Storm and Prowl discussing plans for a library and cultural center once, but within five minutes he learned the definition of the human idiom, ‘two peas in a pod’. The growth wasn’t restricted to the Seekers or Praxians though. Everyone, former Decepticon, former Autobot, and former Neutral alike, all got in on it. Prime was visibly ecstatic, and despite all projections to the contrary, he and Megatron made an effective leadership team. There were whispers that their private life was more volatile, but in public they balanced one another very well.

Starscream took it all in, compiled the data, and actually felt hope soar. It was so unlike him, but then it was so unlike _all_ of them. He dared, spark throbbing with a thrill of fear bubbling under that uncharacteristic hope, to think about a day where he would have a full bond with not just Sideswipe, but Sunstreaker too.

One day, there could even be sparklings.

~ | ~

“What the slag is that?” Skywarp asked, the sofa bouncing as he landed.

The stylus in Sideswipe’s hand was jarred with the rest of him, and his doodling was marred by a jagged line bisecting the screen of the datapad.

“Scrap now,” Sideswipe muttered, stylus already poking at the ‘undo’ button.

“Looks like scrap anyways. Guess Sunny got all the art talent, huh?”

Sideswipe gave Skywarp a flat look, then turned back to his work without a word. _Clearly_ Sunstreaker was the better artist, but every now and then the mood took Sideswipe to draw a little.

Alright, so it sucked slag. He scribbled over it, then deleted the whole file.

“Aw… Why’d you do that? I liked it.”

“It sucked.” Sideswipe tossed the datapad and stylus onto the conversation table, and slumped back into the sofa. It wasn’t all that soft, and the back was low for the Seeker’s wings, but it was better than nothing. Some mechs had nothing but bare metal furnishings. They had three sofas, the rather attractively designed conversation table, and comfortable berths. Starscream had also mentioned something Mixmaster was trying to do with Wheeljack that would create a new, more durable and more plush foam rubber. He was looking forward to that, and made a mental note to prod Sunstreaker once he got home from his shift to start designing some furniture.

It was nice to have pretty things again. Particularly things his twin made.

“So I’m bored,” Skywarp said, pressing into Sideswipe’s side. “It’s always boring when TC has a shift and I don’t.” He poked Sideswipe’s upper arm. “Let’s frag.”

Sideswipe’s optics flared and went wide. “What?”

“Yeah! Let’s frag. It’s fun, and then we can nap.” Skywarp’s hand cruised up Sideswipe’s thigh, and he gave him a lecherous grin. “Which do you like? Cuz I can go either way, but it’d be nice to spike for a change.”

Sideswipe leaned away into the arm of the sofa, staring at Skywarp for a moment before snickering at the ridiculous face he was making. “Get off me, you freak,” he laughed, pushing at Skywarp. “And is that expression supposed to be sexy? What the frag?”

Skywarp chuckled and pushed back playfully. “That’s my smolder, slagger. Of course it’s sexy. Now come on and pop that panel.”

Sideswipe fended off Skywarp’s playful grabs, snickering as purple hands made a comedic attempt to paw at him. “Quit it. Not ‘facing you. Get off.”

“Trying to get off, but you haven’t bared it and shared it yet.”

Skywarp shifting, going for a better angle, and Sideswipe took the chance to twist up to his knees. Sitting on his aft and jammed into a corner was no way to try and wrestle a Seeker that had height and weight on him. Laughing, hands locked, they pushed against one another for dominance until Skywarp leaned in and kissed Sideswipe.

“Hey!” Sideswipe stood, pulling away. “What the frag?!”

“It’s called a kiss.” Skywarp followed, hands reaching, and suddenly what had been funny and playful, and not the _least_ frelling serious became threatening and frightening.

“Stay back.”

Skywarp pounced forward, and disappeared in a flash of purple. Sideswipe heard the _vop_ of displaced air just behind him, but Skywarp grabbed him before he could turn all the way around.

“Let go!” Sideswipe struggled to get into a better position, but Skywarp lifted him off the floor.

“Oh come on! Screamer won’t mind.” Skywarp heaved Sideswipe onto the sofa, still laughing and smiling, even as he caught Sideswipe again as he tried to twist away.

Escape over the back of the sofa was thwarted as Skywarp grabbed Sideswipe’s wrists. Sideswipe kicked out, but it was only a glancing blow. He struggled, gasping and too hot, too afraid. _Sunny!_ he cried out, reaching for his twin.

“Ow! Slagger. Com’on! I know you don’t make Screamer work this hard for it.”

“Stop!”

“Make me~” Skywarp replied in sing-song, then snickered.

Purple hands were everywhere, and Sideswipe was flailing, uncoordinated and panicking. _Sunny!_

_Fight back!_ Sunstreaker shouted over the bond.

Sideswipe brought up an elbow, smashing it right into the arch of Skywarp’s cheek. The Seeker yelped, drawing back enough for Sideswipe to bring up his other arm and deliver a solid punch to the underside of Skywarp’s chin. As he fell back, Sideswipe sat up and followed, hitting again. He grasped after Sunstreaker’s rage, clinging to it, making it his own, and kicked out _hard_ at a wing. Skywarp’s scream rang off the walls.

Sideswipe lunged after him, not thinking, and tore into the Seeker. He went for all the tender, sensitive, damaging spots he could. Skywarp tried to fend him off, but Sideswipe had done this in midair. On solid ground it was even easier.

Then Sunstreaker was suddenly there too. He threw himself at Skywarp with a roar as the Seeker tried to back away from Sideswipe. There was a growl of satisfaction from Sunstreaker as Skywarp pleaded with them to stop, but they ignored him.

_Just like he ignored me,_ Sideswipe thought, watching as Sunstreaker drew his fist back, optics pale, and staring hard at Skywarp’s canopy. _Rip him apart._

_Teach him not to fragging lay hands on you,_ Sunstreaker snarled.

Sunstreaker’s fist never fell, however. His wrist was grabbed, arm wrenched back.

“The frag?!” Thundercracker’s voice shook the windows and rattled the paintings on the walls.

Sideswipe grabbed after his twin, but Thundercracker had the advantage of being on his feet. They were at the berthroom door before Sideswipe caught up, and then he was being shoved in, _hard_.

“Stay! Here!” Thundercracker bellowed, and pushed Sunstreaker back as he tried to get out.

Sideswipe stared, mind reeling. “He-”

“I don’t frelling _care_! You don’t leave this room!”

Sunstreaker slammed against the door as it closed, but Sideswipe heard the lock beep. He tried to open it, but it wouldn’t budge, and for some reason his fingers were shaking too hard to properly hack it.

When Sunstreaker eased him away from the door, Sideswipe curled into his twin and refused to think about anything at all for a while.

~ | ~

Starscream froze mid-step as he entered his home and saw Thundercracker. “Oh Primus, what did Skywarp do now?”

Thundercracker’s optics blazed, going white in a rare showing of true rage. “He’s in the medbay,” he ground out. “Your darling bondmates were shredding him.”

Starscream stepped inside to allow the door to close, frowning. “So I ask again, what did he do?” He fought the urge to cringe back as Thundercracker stomped over to him, but then Thundercracker didn’t often strike out. Not at his trine.

He did snarl, furious, and said, “Nothing to deserve the slagging Sideswipe started and Sunstreaker rushed off shift to help finish.”

Starscream tipped his helm. “Sunstreaker left his shift to come beat on Skywarp with Sideswipe?” And Thundercracker actually believed that Skywarp hadn’t at least instigated a little?

“Yes,” Thundercracker bit out, pushing past Starscream. “I saw him leave. Good fragging thing too, because if I hadn’t gotten here when I had, we’d be a _trine_ mate short right now.” Flight engines whirred, and his optics were still pale, more pink than red. “I will be in the medbay with my mate. Yours are locked in their room, and you better fragging have them sorted before I come back.”

Starscream watched him launch, a boom rattling the windows as Thundercracker broke the sound barrier.

Starscream heaved a sigh, then headed to the energon for a few cubes of some rather pleasant high grade Sideswipe had distilled. Starscream cursed when he reached the lock. Thundercracker hadn’t given him the new code, if he’d done more than scramble it to begin with. Setting the cubes on the floor, Starscream hacked the lock. It didn’t take long as they were all of his design in his own home, but it still took time he didn’t want to leave the twins waiting and trapped.

When the door finally opened, Starscream saw the twins wrapped up tight with one another on the berth. Sunstreaker bared his teeth, but Starscream entered the room anyway, carrying the energon cubes over to the berthside table.

“Get out,” Sunstreaker growled, arms tightening around Sideswipe, the red twin hiding his face in his brother’s neck.

Starscream lifted his hands, and stepped away, only to round the berth and sit on his side of it. Sunstreaker tracked him with pale blue optics, engine grumbling with threat. Once he had himself situated, back to the wall, wings relaxed, Starscream stretched out his legs and crossed his ankles. He met Sunstreaker’s glare with a level gaze of his own and sipped his high grade. “So,” he said at length, “what did Skywarp do?”

“Frag off.”

“If only I could, but Skywarp is in medical, quite badly injured from what I’m told.” Starscream cradled his energon in his lap. “Now I know enough to know that Sideswipe wouldn’t attack without provocation, and there is no way you, who are most aware of your brother’s abilities, would come rushing home to help if it wasn’t serious.” He took another sip, letting his words, and the implied trust and faith he had in the twins, sink in for a moment.

“So. What did Skywarp do?” Starscream asked. Sunstreaker met his optics with a mulish scowl, and remained silent. “Sideswipe?”

“Leave him alone!”

Primus, give him patience. Starscream could feel the frustration bubbling, and cycled his vents a few times to force it back down. “I’m on your side.”

“Yeah? Good! You tell that slagger that if he ever comes near my brother again, I’ll rip his wings off and stab him through the fragging spark with them. Now get out!”

“I’m not leaving,” Starscream replied, more than capable of being stubborn. “My _bondmate_ is upset.”

“You aren’t touching him.”

Starscream stared at Sunstreaker in silence, but he didn’t back down, if anything he bristled even more. Sideswipe said and did nothing, and Starscream could get no sense of him over the delicate thread of their bond. His spark sank. Whatever Skywarp had done, he’d destroyed all the trust Starscream had managed to build,

He finished his energon, dispersing the cube. “I won’t touch you, Sideswipe.” He kept his gaze locked on Sunstreaker. “But neither will I leave.”

Sunstreaker growled, but didn’t argue, and after Starscream had settled in, the lights dimmed by command from one of the twins.

It took a long time for Starscream to drop off. Anger at Skywarp, sadness for this seeming loss of affection, and the frustration of having such a powerful setback swirled in his mind. He woke, not recalling when he’d finally fallen into recharge, and looked around the room. It was empty, and his spark lurched. It was the earliest hours of morning, so where could the twins have gone?

He rushed from the berth, ready to fly, trying to think of someone he could call to help him search who wouldn’t make a fuss over the situation, but stopped as he reached the lounge.

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were recharging on a sofa, which they shouldn’t logically have been able to both lie on together. They were wound around one another so tightly that had it not been for the color of their plating, Starscream wouldn’t have been able to tell whose limb belonged to whom.

Relief came first, but disappointment and sadness rode in fast on its heels. Starscream sighed quietly, then retreated back to his berth. They’d gone so far as to abandon the comfort of the berth to be away from him, how could he possibly _not_ respect that need for distance if he had any hope of fixing this?

Starscream sank onto his berth, curling on his side and trying to shut back down, but recharge would not come.

~ | ~

Starscream tried to reconnect to the twins, he really did.

It was days before Skywarp was released from the medbay and Thundercracker stayed by his side rather than come home. Starscream took those days and made every gesture he could think of to break through the wall of silence and ice Sideswipe and Sunstreaker had built so quickly around themselves. He had no one he could consult. He longed to asked Skyfire’s advice, knowing his lab partner would have just the right perspective, the calm words, the gentle, subtle wisdom that would help Starscream reach his mate, but he didn’t dare.

Word quickly got around that there had been an ‘incident’, but -thank Primus for small miracles- neither Skywarp nor Thundercracker were willing to discuss or push for charges to be levied. Starscream knew that was his one allowance in this as trine, especially as both of his wingmates were furious with him. However, all of that only made Starscream even more wary of confiding in anyone else, even Skyfire. He couldn’t risk this being turned into a factional dispute. Not now. Not when so much was going so well. Construction and clean-up continued apace. There were advancements happening in not just the science sector. Art and culture were being reclaimed when mechs were off duty. There was talk of recreating the Crystal Gardens, and learning centers, apprenticeships… So much, and Starscream didn’t want it to slip from his fingers. He didn’t want it to slip away from the twins or his trine either.

So Starscream tried, fighting to display a patience and understanding he didn’t feel as his goodbye and hello kisses were rejected out of hand. Gone were the easy smiles. Gone were the soft, warm kisses. Gone was the tentative affection. Gone were the brief moments, long minutes, and quiet nights with Sideswipe curled up in his arms, trusting, his spark pulsing close to Starscream’s own. Gone was Sunstreaker’s smile. Gone his quiet hours spend sketching or painting. There were no energon treats. Gone were the sinfully decadent oil cakes Sideswipe had made. Gone. All gone, and no one was talking. Starscream didn’t know _why_ , and it was driving him mad.

Starscream had spent a week trying to share the room with them, but no matter what the time, or whether or not the twins were awake when he did join them, he would inevitably wake to discover he was alone and they were recharging on the couch. He gave up and began recharging with Skywarp and Thundercracker again, but that only lasted a few nights. Skywarp was angry and possessive, and took Starscream being in his berth as permission and victory over the twins.

Which it absolutely was _not_.

He was tired all the time. The lounge and the sofas in it were not meant for recharge, particularly for a winged mech. Starscream tossed and turned, even woke as he crashed to the floor a few times. He woke with a constant ache in his wing hinges. His shoulders felt hunched and tight, and there was an ache low in his back that he couldn’t figure out. He had recharged for _years_ on an unpadded slab of metal, and _that_ had not caused him such discomfort.

Starscream’s temper -always a beast and close to the surface when he felt off-balance- flared at the least provocation everywhere _but_ in his home. He would mostly lash out in the lab, frustration, exhaustion, and plain bad mood boiling over and scalding all within range. And while Decepticons and Autobots mostly ignored his shrill rants over their incompetence and idiocy, he had actually sent one little neutral fleeing in tears.

What was worse, was that he actually felt bad about it. Immediately bad, but that only slagged him off more.

“Maybe you should take the rest of the day off, Starscream,” Wheeljack had suggested, the tone gentle, but Starscream knew it was an order.

It was the last thing Starscream wanted to do. Go home? Where his bondmate, trine mates, and whatever the Pit Sunstreaker was to him were? Silent and angry and tense? He didn’t want to go home, and wasn’t that just slagged to all hell?

Starscream slammed his equipment away, handed his notes to Skyfire -though ‘handed’ was a rather generous term for the way he shoved the datapad at the shuttle’s canopy- then stormed out. He shot into the sky, pushing hard and flying high and fast.

It didn’t last long. He felt breathless and dizzy, and there was no way _Starscream_ was going to let himself fall out of the sky to such an ignominious death. He flew home, only to drop to the sofa in the empty lounge. He knew the others were all home. Skywarp and Thundercracker were in their room, and the twins were in theirs, and the apartment was a tomb.

Starscream slumped, ignoring the pinch of his wings as he did. He was slagging tired. It wasn’t until he caught himself rubbing his chest, fingers pressing in hard, that he suddenly realized what was wrong.

The bond. It was the bond.

Starscream was off the sofa and striding to the berthroom before the thought even completed. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe both lurched to their feet. Sideswipe wobbled.

“You’re wounded,” Starscream said. When the frag had that happened? _Again_.

“Get out,” Sunstreaker snarled, stepping forward and in front of Sideswipe.

Starscream ignored him and ran a scan on both of them. He wished he could scan himself, but he was sure of what he would find. Added all together, and it was obvious, and Starscream kicked himself for not realizing it sooner. His restlessness, Sideswipe’s stupid injuries, the constant, nagging fatigue, all of it spoke of a failing bond.

“Our bond is fading,” Starscream announced, optics on Sideswipe. “If we don’t do something about this, we’ll go mad or die, or go mad, _then_ die, and I, for one, am _not_ willing to allow that.”

Sideswipe’s optics paled to white and brightened. He hunched back behind his twin as Sunstreaker growled threateningly, “Touch him, and I’ll tear off your wings before crushing your spark!”

“You’ll kill your brother too,” Starscream pointed out. He walked, posture purposely relaxed, almost lazy, and affecting a bored expression as he sat on the side of the berth.

“That was always a risk, but I can keep him alive. We don’t need your spark for that.”

Starscream tipped his helm, thoughts flashing, and he finally made the connection. He was an idiot. He really was. “Sideswipe,” he said, voice soft and calm. “ _How_ was Skywarp ‘playing’?” Because that was all Skywarp had said. They were ‘playing’, then Sideswipe ‘freaked out’.

Sunstreaker bared sharp fangs, hands curled into tight fists. “It wasn’t _playing_.”

“I told him no,” Sideswipe finally replied, voice barely loud enough to carry over the continuous rumble from his twin. “I told him to stop, but he wouldn’t.”

Starscream was on his feet in an instant. “He-”

“No. But he wanted to,” Sideswipe hurried to say, both twins taking a couple quick steps back from Starscream. “He wanted to, and I told him to stop, and when he wouldn’t, I made him stop.”

Starscream hissed, wings arching high, and ordered Skywarp and Thundercracker to come to the twins’ room at once. He was shaking. He should have told Sideswipe’s secret to his trine and just made it clear that they weren’t to say anything. He knew Skywarp. He _knew_ it was a bad idea to heed Sideswipe’s desire for secrecy, but then his glitched trine mate should have taken the hint _long_ before the point that Sideswipe thought he had to defend himself.

“What?” Skywarp snapped as the door opened. He was too busy sneering at the twins to see Starscream’s fury, but Thundercracker did, and he caught Skywarp by a wing and hauled him back just before he would have been inside Starscream’s attack range.

“Starscream?” Thundercracker asked, voice low, _wings_ dipping low in deliberate, immediate submission.

“Let’s get one thing _very_ clear,” Starscream purred. The tone itself grabbed Skywarp’s attention, and his wings dropped too. “You are _never_ to touch Sideswipe or Sunstreaker again. Not _ever_. If they decide they want to ‘face you, they will approach you. _Directly_ ,” he added, casting a glower back at the twins. He would have no misinterpretations.

“That-”

“Not a word!” Starscream shrieked, suppressing a wince as his voice echoed off the confining walls and hurt even his audials. “Not a word,” he repeated much more softly. He braced for the twins to tear at him, and said, “They both have suffered rapes before.”

The twins gasped, and Sideswipe made some small sound of protest.

“How many times, Skywarp, must you be told that no really does mean no? Stop means exactly that.”

“I’ve never raped anyone!” Skywarp argued. “You know that. You both told me the difference. We were just _playing_ , then _he_ suddenly freaked out!”

“He freaked out because you would not stop when he asked you to,” Starscream said sternly. “This is not up for debate. Do not touch them. Do not joke about touching them. Do not dare to _play_ with them in ways that would bring past trauma to the surface.

“Damnit! I was slagging _happy_. _I_ was _happy_! Do you have any idea how long I fought and clawed and prayed to feel content in my life?!”

“We all have, Star,” Thundercracker responded, tone gentle.

Starscream snorted. “Well, I’m going to get it back.” He turned so he could see the twins as well. “And I am not willing to die for this. We are _going_ to fix this slagging bond.”

“You just lectured Skywarp about… about- And now you’re telling me I _have_ to merge sparks with you?” Sideswipe demanded, but his optics remained terror-pale, and even Sunstreaker looked more afraid than defensive.

Shaking his helm, Starscream dropped to the berth. “Yes. Just like I _have_ to merge with you. Or have you completely forgotten the fact that _you_ volunteered for this? We agreed to do this for the sake of peace. For the future of our planet and people. It’s done, and it’s _staying_ done.”

He threw his hands up in exasperation. “It was fine before. You even came to me a few times. And while I can’t help that I wish for more from a bondmate, we _can_ continue to do as we had before. We merge only enough to keep our sparks and the bond stable. I won’t touch you. You can plan it out and frelling _schedule_ it, if you want to! I’ll even find us an apartment with three berthrooms instead of two, but you are going to _both_ suck it up, figure it out in your own slagging heads, or I will tell Ratchet!”

Sunstreaker and Sideswipe both gasped, betrayed shock etching their identical faces.

“You wouldn’t,” Sunstreaker whispered.

“I most definitely would.” Starscream really would too. Pits, he probably wouldn’t even have to tell. Ratchet was often in the labs. Often enough to run one of his check-up quick scans on Starscream and get results that the medic’s absolute care of the sick and injured would not allow him to ignore. He might even figure it out the next time Sideswipe injured himself. The mech was hardly clumsy, and Ratchet was bound to notice the increasing frequency of injuries.

The four of them continued to stare at Starscream, so he stood, abruptly clapping his hands together. “Obviously, this needs a little time to process.” He waved a hand as he headed toward the door. “Wrap your minds around it, brace yourselves, but in two days, the three of us are taking a day off and fixing this bond.”

High-handed, but Starscream had never feared that. He wanted the warmth and companionship back, but he would take having a stable, solid bond, and if there was anything he was, it was a survivor. He would, and had, committed atrocities to preserve his own life, and while the idea of an unwilling bondmate did not sit right with him at all, he’d rather live than go insane and die of an atrophied bond.

Shoving a stunned Thundercracker and gaping Skywarp out of the door and toward their own room, Starscream left the twins to themselves to figure it out. He had some research on bonds to do anyway.

~ | ~

Sideswipe waited until the door shut to collapse onto the berth. He was shaking, but there was a part of him that really did know that he was being unreasonable.

_Not unreasonable,_ Sunstreaker said, then sighed. _He does have a point though._

Sideswipe rolled to his side as his twin joined him on the berth. _We agreed to this. The whole death thing was just supposed to be in case he wasn’t sincere, but he really has been._ Not that _knowing_ that took away the fear that lanced his spark at the thought of being pinned down by a powerful Seeker.

Sunstreaker sighed again, heavily, and wrapped his arms around Sideswipe. _I could keep you from dying._

_Or I could pull you down with me._

They were both silent for a while, pressing into their bond, fighting back the ugly memories from so long ago.

“I should be over it.”

“Frag that,” Sunstreaker huffed. _There’s no slagging time limit on the sort of damage we took._

_Yeah, but I **did** agree to do this._

“Peace is kind of nice,” Sunstreaker offered, voice soft as he nuzzled Sideswipe’s audial horn. “Always something to do. Finally putting our lives back together.” _We deserve to be happy too. I want that. I want to paint more. I want to help make our world beautiful again._

Sideswipe nodded. _Wasn’t even Starscream that pushed._ He was still worried about Skywarp. He was a bit angry at Starscream though, for telling their secret. _But maybe if he’d known, he wouldn’t have pushed? I wouldn’t have freaked out._

“Yeah, no.” Sunstreaker pulled his helm back to look Sideswipe in the optics. “He should have stopped. Fine, _he_ thought he was just screwing around, but you were fragging scared. He should have stopped.” _And now he’s ordered them not to touch us. We ever do want to frag one of them, we’ll have to say so, out loud, nice and blunt._

_Think that’s likely?_ Sideswipe asked.

Sunstreaker shrugged. _Think you can do it? I mean, he’s right, we did volunteer, and it’s not even like he’s expecting it daily, going, ‘Hey, service me now, whore’._

Sideswipe scowled at Sunstreaker’s wording.

“He’s… and I can’t believe this is me saying this, but he’s not even that bad,” Sunstreaker muttered.

Sideswipe let it all tumble around in his head a bit, then nodded. It helped that Starscream was so adamant about his trine mates not touching them. That he took Sideswipe’s side. _Guess I really should have told him._

“Didn’t know he would choose you first.”

“I’m his bondmate,” Sideswipe replied with a shrug of his own. That decided it. Starscream was his bondmate, one he willingly went to for the sake of his fellow Autobots and peace and a chance at a real life.

He lifted his optics back up to Sunstreaker’s. “Guess it’s time to make Prime proud.”

~ | ~

When Starscream entered their apartment two days after their ‘talk’, Sideswipe stood, Sunstreaker following him. They faced Skywarp and Thundercracker, and Sideswipe said, “Ok, bye.”

“Wait. What?” Starscream asked, blinking.

Thundercracker rose, tugging Skywarp up with him. They’d both apologized, which was nice, but Sideswipe was still too unnerved with them home to bare his spark. Sunstreaker had bluntly stated that, and surprisingly, both Seekers had agreed to go stay with Acid Storm for a few days.

“Have fun~” Skywarp sang as he and Thundercracker slipped out the balcony doors and dropped over the edge.

Sideswipe went and locked the doors, feeling the weight of Starscream’s confused stare. When he was all done, he nudged Sunstreaker over the bond, and tipped his helm toward the berthroom door while meeting Starscream’s optics. Starscream followed, and once the three of them were in the room, Sideswipe locked that door too, then turned to face his bondmates.

“Ok, so…”

“We’re renewing the bond?” Starscream guessed.

“Yeah,” Sunstreaker replied while Sideswipe rubbed at the back of his neck. “Mind being on the bottom?”

“No. Are you staying to watch?” Starscream crossed to the berth and settled in the middle on his back.

Sunstreaker shook his helm. “No, I’ll be joining in. Unless you object?” He climbed up onto the berth, then across Starscream as the Seeker shook his helm.

Both turned expectant optics toward Sideswipe, waiting, allowing him the final choice, this last chance to back out if he just couldn’t do it. He fidgeted a moment, then crawled onto the berth. It wasn’t that he was afraid of Starscream. Pits, he could remember the mergings before being pretty damn nice. He even missed having Starscream snuggling him and Sunstreaker as they all recharged. There was a safe feeling to having one of those pretty wings draped over him during the night.

“I do want this,” Sideswipe said out loud, but it was more to remind himself than to convince Starscream.

“If you both bond with me, you won’t have an out later,” Starscream pointed out, arms up, hands slightly curled to either side of his helm.

It was a relaxed and non-threatening position, all of Starscream’s vulnerable parts within easy reach and undefended if Sideswipe wanted to tear into him. He didn’t want to though. Starscream really had done all he could to make the situation a tolerable one from the get-go. Better than just ‘tolerable’, actually.

“You sure you really want this?” Sideswipe asked, gesturing between himself and Sunstreaker. “Can’t promise something else won’t happen to glitch me out again.”

“I’m sure, and if something happens, we’ll deal with it. I expected a lot worse when Megatron informed me I would be the Decepticons’ offering to peace, and I meant what I said the other day. It can be as little as just enough to keep us alive and sane. Beyond that, it’s your choice.”

Sideswipe cycled his vents, and braced up on his elbow so he wasn’t lying on Starscream’s wing. “Ok. Just… don’t hold too tight this time, ok?”

Starscream’s hands opened, then he pushed them higher, grasping the top edge of the berth.

That was more than Sideswipe had hoped for, or even would have asked for.

_He went sane and really considerate somewhere after the end of the war,_ Sunstreaker said with a grin, mirroring Sideswipe’s position.

Sideswipe couldn’t help chuckling, but just shook his helm at Starscream’s curious, arched optic ridge. He tapped the Seeker’s canopy. “Come on. We’re choosing this.” He smiled a little, feeling a rare heat creep into his face. “We’re choosing to try and make the most of this, so let’s get on with it before I lose my nerve.”

“How could I ever resist such seductive passion?” Starscream asked with a smirk, plating retracting. He was being deliberately slow about it, teasing, playing and trying to lighten the mood. First the canopy, then the outer plating, then the laser core, which seemed to open even more slowly, leaving his spark to pulse brightly. Then finally, the spark crystal itself.

Sideswipe’s plating was retracting before he commanded it, spark reaching for the core of his bondmate. “Primus,” he whispered, allowing himself to lean forward, drawn in. They both gasped as their sparks touched, and Starscream’s hands tightened on the berth.

Sunstreaker looped an arm over Sideswipe’s back, and wedged himself in, forcing just enough separation to reach out with his own bared spark. Energy swept a thrilling, tingling path through Sideswipe’s body, and he could feel the echo in Sunstreaker. Beneath them, Starscream gasped and arched his back, trying to push closer. The bond was so fragile, one thin, delicate thread of spider silk, but Sideswipe latched onto it, and felt as Sunstreaker did as well. Starscream was there, distant, but there and reaching back to them.

Sideswipe’s spark synchronized with his twin’s, and the next thick, rolling throb of power from them tore a sharp cry from Starscream. His wings twitched against the surface of the berth, and his legs moved restlessly.

“Fraggin’ hot,” Sunstreaker purred, and dipped his helm to nibble and suck at Starscream’s neck.

Sideswipe panted, focusing on the bond entirely. The pleasure, the intensity of it, was secondary. It was the rightness, the sense of welcome and belonging that pulled at him, something he’d only ever felt before with Sunstreaker.

“Please,” Starscream whimpered, trembling, his need echoing over the merge.

Sunstreaker moaned, and fell deeper into it, and Sideswipe followed him, letting the heat and light and blissful waves crash and break over him. Starscream bucked up hard, shouting, helm thrown back. Sideswipe gasped for air, then dove headlong into the overload, his mates’ moans and cries echoing in his audials.

~ | ~

Starscream downed his energon, checking for the fourth time that he had the datapads he needed for the presentation he was leading. He wasn’t usually nervous, but if they wanted to grab a nice orbit around the star he and the other scientists had been looking at, then the construction on the planetary thrusters was going to _have_ to start in the next few weeks.

He was nearly out the door when his wing was grabbed and tugged.

“Slow down, slagger.”

“I’m going to be late,” Starscream complained, but not very sincerely, particularly when Sideswipe’s mouth pressed against his own. He melted into the kiss, purring.

“Move it, Sides, I want mine.”

Starscream snickered as Sideswipe was bodily moved out of the way, and dutifully lowered his head to kiss Sunstreaker as well, respiration cycling a little faster as desire drifted across the bond to him. The past months had truly been good to the three of them.

“We’re all going to be late,” Thundercracker said, voice raised to be heard properly over Skywarp’s kissy noises.

“Shut up, you’re no better.” Sideswipe gave Skywarp a shove toward the door.

Starscream reluctantly pulled away, fingers lingering on warm gold and red plating. “I’ll see you all tonight.”

“Good luck!” Sideswipe called, waving.

Smiling, Starscream waved back, and launched. There future was looking particularly bright -pun utterly intended- and he was going to be sure it was brighter still.

**Author's Note:**

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